How to Deal with a Bully what to do if your Child is being Bullied

Being a victim of bullying can start when a bully perceives that he or she has a victim who can be intimidated, threatened and harmed.  This being the case, children of a young age who are being bullied and have spoken to their parents about being bullied need the help of their parents.  Because many parents teach their children not to fight, parents must investigate the charges against the bully immediately.  If the bully is inflicting physical abuse upon a child, criminal charges, where applicable, should be made.  Bullying can range from verbal threats and name calling, making fun of a child, harassment, theft or the taking of the property of another child, and physical abuse.  The main thing a bully wants to instill into his or victim so that the victim domination can occur. 

Parents should talk to their children and warn them about bullies at an early age.  For those who choose to teach their children not to fight, they must train their children to tell the adults around them.  Teachers, neighbors, older brothers and sisters, parents themselves, and if necessary, the police and law enforcement agents should be contacted and the behavior of the bully should be made plain.  Parents must teach their children to be open on this subject and not to fear a bully.  Bullies, for many reasons, like to claim victims and don’t always pick on everyone.  The bully likes to be perceived by others as being superior, when in reality, they are inferior.  Bullies do not possess and do not care to possess the attributes of kindness, patience, and love towards their victims.  They actually are to be pitied.  They will hurt, malign, and seek to crush the spirit of their victims. 

 Some parents who see their children being constantly bullied get tired and take their children to self-defense classes.  There the children learn to be physically aggressive and to protect themselves.  Spending money for such classes often pays off when the child who is being bullied learns to stand up to the bully and stop the bully from perceiving that he or she is weak.  Once a bully is shown that his or her behavior will not longer be tolerated, many bullies cease from inflicting verbal or physical pain on others. Because teens like to be accepted, included, and liked, many of them will not tell on a bully, but will allow themselves to suffer until the physical and emotional pain becomes unbearable.  Then they will tell their parents or those in authority.  This is not good, but this is often the case.  Seeking to handle a bully alone or a bully group can lead to more aggression by the bully and sometimes withdrawal or suicide by the victim. 

 Because there are laws in place to protect victims from bullying, anyone can report bullying abuse. If there is physical abuse taking place, the police can be contacted and an investigation into the matter can begin.  Many bullies have to have a gang or group to bolster their ego.  Those in their gang often obey the bully and inflict similar abuses on other victims.  It is amazing, but most children can name a bully and their cohorts. Smaller children are more apt to tell the truth than older children for fear of the consequences.  Parents must teach their children to be open and if they see black eyes, bruised or broken hands, arms or body parts, they must not only take their children to the hospital, but seek to get to the root of the matter. 

Often parents must remove their children away from a bully or an institution that will not do their part to protect those in its care.  If a daycare, school, or any institution is negligent in protecting those who are committed to its care, parents have no recourse but to take their children elsewhere where bullying is not tolerated.  To allow a child to remain in such a non-protective environment is criminal.  Many children refuse to go to school or feign sick almost weekly because they fear bullying at school.  As parents become aware of the root cause of their children’s maladies and excuses, it is up to them to find sanctuary for their children. 

There will, perhaps, always be bullies, but there is help also available to those who need it.  Counselors, coaches, teachers, mentors and other responsible adults are present in our society to help victims of bullying.  Bullies hate being disciplined, despite the fact that they seek to discipline others.  Community awareness and quick retribution for bullies will help to stave off their advances and deeds.  Silence is never golden when it comes to bullying, but speaking up, standing up, and resisting such behavior is.