What to do when my Child is the Bully

When you hear that your child is being bullied, most parents jump right into action. They call the school, meet with the bully’s parents and take precautions.  But when most people hear that their child is the bully, they ignore it – or they don’t know what to do. Well, here are a few things you should do if your child is the bully instead of the bullied.

1) Sit and talk to your child. If you just yell at them, they will get angry and won’t listen, and more often than not they bully the children at school even more. Children that bully have a reason why they do it. A child that bullies most likely has an issue about home life or a problem at school. When you talk to your child be kind and understanding; ask them what is bothering them; tell them you won’t be mad. Nine times out of 10 children are afraid that if they tell their parent what is wrong, the parent will grow angry at them. Discuss what ever is bothering your child. If they open up and tell you how they feel, they tend not to bully the children at school for anger they have for home life.

2) If discussing the issues with your child does not work and they do not open up, try telling them about your encounters with bullies. Most bullies were being bullied before they started to bully other children. Most bullies believe that nobody understands what they went through, so they subject other children to the pain they felt. So if you tell your child about your pain you felt when you were bullied and show them you understand what they went through, they will most likely open up.

3) If you have a hothead or stubborn child, other methods might get them to stop bullying. If your child does not know what it feels like to be bullied, subject them to a brief period of time where they are getting bullied. It will show them that it may be fun to bully, but it’s not fun to be bullied.

So in the end bullying is just a way for some kids to express their anger. If you find the root of the pain and anger, you will probably find the end of the bully. Show your kid that your care and that you understand the pain they are going through; show them that no matter what, you will work out what ever obstacle comes their way. Then and only then will you truly get to the heart and motive of the bully.